Monday, October 28, 2013

A Kanda Yuu Lemon -- Dare To Breathe

Character: Kanda Yuu

Fandom: D. Gray-Man

OC: Rin Kato, long braided white hair, magenta eyes, reserved

Inspiration: The fact that they're on a train...I dunno, I thought it was slightly delicious :3  Enjoy!

Rin Kato is not beautiful, at least not to herself.  She looks at her reflection and sees only faded scars and mystery.  When she takes her eye patch off, she sees only an ugly, jagged scar that runs through the center of her eye.  No, she is not beautiful in a conventional sense, not anymore.
She used to be lovely.  Her eyes are unlike any she's ever seen before, a sort of crippling magenta that is both powerful and gentle.  Her hair she has inherited from her mother, long and white and silken.  Her pale skin, her long legs, her soft, subtle curves.  They used to make her confident, but now she only sees the scar that covers half of her face.  Beauty has abandoned her.
But not everyone agrees with this sentiment.  Kanda Yuu will never, ever admit it, but he finds her lovely.  He finds her lovely in an irresistible way, in a manner that he cannot always ignore.  Over the years, she has grown on him, changed him as well.  He is gentle when he is around her, more human.  And, like humans, Kanda is often struck by the crippling desire to go where no man has ever gone before.  He sees her hair and he wants to run his hands through it, let it fall over her shoulders.  He sees her face and he wants to hold it, kiss along the scar that isn't all that terrible, at least not to him.  Lastly, he sees her body and he wants to drag it up against his.  Feel her, touch her, breathe life into her.
It is a burning, passionate need that makes him unsure and also hesitant, because he is rarely consumed by the desires of the flesh.  Kanda has never cared for that sort of thing.  But when he sees Rin he cannot help but feel a blistering heat lick at his body. 
"Kanda?  Don't fall asleep on me," Rin smiles, and nudges him with her foot.  His eyes snap open and he stares at her from across the train compartment.  He normally would have forced himself to look away from her after a moment, but this time he doesn't.  He knows he's being rude and that he's making Rin uncomfortable, but he can't help it.
Her cheeks flare with pink and she covers her eye with the palm of her hand.  "Sorry…it took it off cause it was bothering me.  I'll put it back on if it makes you uneasy…" and she begins to slip her eye patch back over the scar that mars her face, only for Kanda to suddenly lurch forward and grab her wrist.
"No," he says, voice low.  For a moment, they stare at each other, eyes wide and unsure, inches of space beckoning them forward.  And then Kanda grunts and shifts back, retreating to his seat.  "You look fine, onna. [1]  I don't give a damn about how you look."
It isn't true, at least not completely.  He doesn't care about her scar.  But to say that he doesn't care about her entire appearance is a blatant lie.  He can't get enough of her.  She is beautiful to him, like an exotic white flower that blooms where other flowers cannot.  And her scar is just another aspect of her beauty.  It makes her look fearsome and yet gentle, soft, endearing.  And when Kanda sees it, sees her entire face bared to him, it makes him crazy with the desire to reach out for her.
Rin chuckles a little, but her cheeks don't lose their pinkness.  She nods and puts the eye patch back into her lap, looking down at it.  For a moment, all is silent save the rustling and shaking of the train.  But then, Rin murmurs out a barely coherent, "Thank you."  And Kanda is suddenly feeling his own cheeks darken, because Rin is one of the only people who can see beyond his words, to the truth at their center.  And it makes him a little embarrassed.
He scoffs and jerks his chin away, but his gruff reaction only makes her smile wider, bite her lip to hold in the laugh that will surely make him angry.
His eyes slant over that lip, the way her teeth capture it and pull, sucking it in.  He grits his teeth because he suddenly wants to capture that mouth, scrap his teeth over that lip, taste her.  And the sudden crash and ebb of startling arousal pushes him back into his seat, away from her, away from anything that might lead to change.  And yet even as he retreats Kanda can't look away.  From that mouth.  From those eyes, which haven't quite noticed the extent of his jarred desire.  He swallows thickly and tears his gaze to the window, but even the landscape that passes them hurriedly by doesn't stop to help him.  He is still blisteringly aware of her.
He wonders if this is what it's always like, this strange human emotion that he has thus far successfully avoided.  He wonders why his body and will is only just now shaking against it.  But somewhere, deep in a thought that just grazes through his mind, Kanda knows that it is her fault.  Her fault for always drawing his eyes, his attention, even the shaded affection that he doesn't let anyone know he has for her.  Her fault for being so blissfully irresistible and irritating, so much so that he can't stop thinking about her.  Wondering where she is, if she's safe when she's on a mission without him, if she's thinking about him, too…
He tries closing his eyes, tries reverting back to his original position and ignoring her, but even this isn't helping.  Behind his lids he can still see her, but this time it is different.  She is biting her lip and staring at him with wide, dilated eyes, and her expression is filled with such expressive desire that Kanda's eyes are flying open the next moment, unable to find any sort of rest despite the fact that Rin has stopped watching him.  Her expression isn't filled with anything but boredom.  She has stopped biting her lip.
But she has noticed that he seems to be uncomfortable, and her eyes slant back to him when she feels him watching her closely.  She raises a pale eyebrow and tilts her head a little, as though she's not looking at him but rather some painting in a gallery, interpreting all the angles of sashayed color.  "Kanda?" she wonders, and is surprised when he jerks back, as though shocked, electrocuted by her voice.
He is, in a way.  He hadn't expected his name to pass through those lips.  Hadn't expected it to sound quite so low, so thick with emotion, with a sort of unconscious undercurrent of…something.  But that isn't what surprises him.  He is shocked because of the way his body reacts to that one little sound.  The way his blood burns through his veins, hotly, shooting down through his body and curling around one area of himself that makes him morbidly horrified.
He watches emotions pass through her expression, watches her sweep her eyes over his face.  Worry is what makes her inch closer, lifting herself off her seat to settle across the cabin beside him.  He stiffens when she tries to touch his forehead.  His long fingers snatch her wrist before she can press her skin against his and inadvertently make him worse off.  He tugs his jacket farther around him and looks away with a scowl.  His eyes are explosive, and though they are bathed in their usual annoyance, Rin sees something else in them that makes her pause.  Something strong, that waves through that obsidian with powerful abandonment. 
"…Kanda?" she murmurs, and her voice is lower now.  But he has a slightly better handle on himself this time, and his body doesn't shake or jerk at the sound of his name rolling off that tongue.  The tongue that he suddenly wants to feel over his skin, curling around his - "Kanda, you look a little sick.  Are you…are you ok?"  She puts a hand on his knee because she isn't sure where else she should touch him, and he pulls back with a sort of jolting consternation.  Her fingers burn right through his clothing and he bites his tongue to stop himself from making a further fool of himself.  But it's easier said than done.
"Fine," he grunts, not daring to look at her, not even daring to breathe.  This will pass, he knows it will.  Soon he won't want her so badly anymore and things will go back to normal.  His entire life is planned out to the minute and he can't afford to waste time on stupid little things like this.  But he doesn't anticipate her hand to raise toward his face, with the intention of pressing a palm to his forehead.  Doesn't anticipate it to brush over the vaguely noticeable but well hidden bulge that is the source of all his discomfort. 
Rin pauses, then pales, suddenly nervous because she isn't entirely sure what just happened, or if her mind is somehow conjuring this up.  But the way Kanda reacts, the way he hisses and drags her hand away, cheeks exploding into rare slivers of color, that is what makes her realize that she is not dreaming.  Not making anything up.  Kanda  Yuu is…aroused.  For her.  She gapes.
And it is her disbelief that makes Kanda angry.  The way her eyes turn wide, shocked, as though she cannot believe that she has made him like this, that he can even get like this in the first place.  As though she isn't aware of just how desirable she is.  As though she isn't aware of how much of a man he is, how he has needs and thoughts just like every other even though he fiercely tries to ignore them.  He grits his teeth, looking at that surprise and seeing rejection in its stead.  He waits for her to tell him off, waits to hear the words that will shatter more than just his arousal, though he is loath to admit it.
But he doesn't hear anything.  Just the suddenly harried breathing that fills the cabin.  Just his own heart, which pumps and beats right up against his chest.  And suddenly Rin is leaning closer to him, hand easing over his leg again.  He looks down at her expression and sees a certain curiosity in her eyes.  But there is something else, too.  More of that disbelief.  But this time it isn't directed at him, but at herself.
He grabs her hand and pushes it away, gruffly muttering, "Don't.  Don't touch me."  Not there.  Not like that, with those gentle, forgiving fingers.  Not if she doesn't want to do exactly as he says, go somewhere in which there is no return from.  But she doesn't listen.  She just twists her hand in his, easily threading her fingers around his fingers and then looking up at him.  And her eyes are a wide, dilated mess.  And she is biting her lip.  He stares.  Stares as she silently eases forward, hesitantly, her breath hot and low as it scrapes over his skin, her lips a trembling symphony that barely brushes over his hair, forging at path toward his mouth.
He is stock still, body locked with surprise, amazement.  Her lips press against his and he stares at her, an unmoving wall that doesn't know what to do.  He is taken aback with his own disbelief as it courses through him like wildfire, like a chemical which is icy cold and yet hot, hot against his skin.  His body jolts when her hand rises up to palm that bulge.  She is strangely confident in herself today.  Perhaps because she never knew how he felt, and the realization makes her feel powerful.  Powerful and beautiful and ready to show him.  Show him what, only Kanda can imagine.  But he likes what said imagination is coming up with.
She pulls away just slightly, eyes opening so that she can look at him.  Her eyes dart down to where her hand is laid against the most intimate part of him.  His gaze follows hers, marveling at the freedom he is allowing her.  When he looks back up into her eyes, he sees that she is already looking at him.  She smiles a tiny smile and breathes out nervously.  "I didn't know…" she whispers, but her words drag off into nothingness.  Didn't know what?  That he's been pining over her for months?  That his body always seems to betray him when he's around her?  That he's spent countless cold showers trying to force himself to forget about her, the way she moves, the curves of her body, the way he can easily imagine her bare beneath him, moving with him in sync? 
She is so close to him that he can feel her lips trembling against his, just barely brushing over him.  He can feel her body heat scorching through the side of his jacket and he suddenly wants to take it off, and hers too.  Run his hands over those curves and shake her down until she feels as helpless as he does now.  His eyes glint into hers as he curses in his native tongue, his mind switching back and forth, back and forth as he struggles to grapple with his wishes.  If he gives into her now, things between them will forever be different.  But the way she careens into him, waiting for him, wondering if she has the confidence to kiss him again…she makes up his mind for him and he can't stop himself.  Can't stop himself from allowing his mouth to crash against hers, pushing her back from the force of his kiss, drag her down with the depth of his passion.
She gasps and her hand raises from his pants to drag up his chest, into his hair.  She rocks against him, against that delicious force, against his body and his insistent mouth and his taste, which drowns her and makes her feel alive.  He pushes her back, until she feels her back laying against the seat.  She doesn't entirely know how she got there, how Kanda had been able to maneuver her down and himself between her legs.  What Rin does know is that having him pressing against her, feeling the effects of his arousal pushing through her clothes, it makes her crazy for more.
A noise leaves her throat and it makes his eyes flash open to stare at her.  His eyes are explosive again, burning with a fire that reaches the very depths of her.  She writhes against him, trying vainly to rub his arousal against hers.  The clothing between them provides a hindering barrier, but friction still sears through and Kanda grunts, stopping the fierce kiss to stare down at her, at the way she is laying beneath him, breathing ragged, chest heaving.
He leans back onto his knees and his eyes dip casually over that body, memorizing the way she is staring up at him with that silent plea.  She is glad that she isn't wearing her eye patch suddenly, glad that she can see him properly.  With his jacket shoved away from his hips, the bulge of his pants is that much more obvious and he looks delicious, hovering above her like that.  But the shivers that rise up within her at the sight of him is nothing, nothing compared to the raw feeling she gets when he touches her. 
She is wearing her long Black Order jacket, the black pants that accompany it, the boots.  But she has changed the usual top for a gray sweater, comfortable for traveling.  The soft cashmere of it is luxurious against her skin, but Kanda's hands are even better, even more amazing as he dips his fingers beneath that sweater to trace up her abdomen.  She watches, arms above her head, legs propped up around his hips, as he drags that fabric up and up and up to reveal more of her than he has ever seen.  Parts of her that he has only dreamt of touching.
His eyes dart to hers, molding over her features as his large hands cup over her chest.  Her eyes drift closed because it feels nice, but then flash back open a moment later when she feels him fiddle with the clasp of her bra, which lays between her breasts.  It snaps open and he pushes it away, lifting the sweater so that he can lean down and kiss her.  Kiss the soft mounds of flesh and fulfill at least one of his burning desires.
She is soft and supple and exactly as he'd imagined her to be.  And her reaction is even better.  Her hands slip into his hair and she sighs a breathy moan slivered with bits of that light, delicious desire.  Her head inches back, her chin up as she admires the way her body zings with pleasure.  His tongue and his lips and even his teeth, which gently push against her nipples and softly scrap down her skin, it all makes her want to succumb body and soul. 
His fingers massage over her other breast, and he switches here and there, as though he can't help but pay equal kisses to each breast.  He licks a burning path through the valley of her chest and then cups her firmly with his free hand, as though testing the exact suppleness of that flesh, the way it conforms to his fingers, the way it is easily, flexibly pressed and molded.  And only when he has had his fill of her does Kanda raise his head and turn his explosive eyes to hers.
He lowers his mouth back down to her lips and slowly, lazily kisses her.  The train rocks and pulses over the tracks and his body rocks and pulses over her.  But it isn't enough.  Not enough rocking or pulsing or touching.  She doesn't just want slow kisses or tender exploration.  Though her body is on edge, completely and utterly electrified from Kanda's startling affection, Rin wants more.  Her mouth hastens against his and her hips buck up to roll over his erection, which has only grown harder.  And though there is still a certain amount of hesitance between them, Kanda doesn't pause when he growls and shoves his hips against hers, grinding, pinning, rubbing.  Doesn't pause when Rin gasps and moans, louder, throwing her head back.  His mouth descends on her pale, long neck and she grips him hard as he nibbles and careens against her.
Kanda is rough.  She isn't sure why she is surprised by this.  His entire demeanor is naturally hard, like the siphoned edges of steel.  His teeth scrap over her neck and his hands tug and push at her jacket, dragging her arms from it.  He is insistent and domineering even in the face of hesitance.  But Rin is only further turned on by this.  Her body pulses and pounds for him.  She has often dreamt of this exact moment, but as Kanda hurries to pull his clothes off, fumbling with his jacket, his shirt, his pants, Rin throws away everything she'd dreamt about and replaces it with now.  His jacket falls to the floor.  His shirt hangs loose around his hard chest.  His pants are dragged down slender hips and his cock, when it is finally within her sight, is like nothing she's ever imagined.  He is perfect, every part of him.
He rocks back against her, lips back on hers, tongue smoothing against her lip, tasting her.  His fingers tug at her pants, dragging them down her thighs.  They are too much trouble to take off all the way so they stay there, at her knees, and soon her cotton underwear follows them.  He rocks back on his knees and stares down at her, just as she'd done to him.  His eyes burn like coals and she erupts into shivers of unbearable lust, which only gets worse when his fingers reach down to feel exactly how wet she is.  He hums, a proud, smug sort of sound, and smirks viciously down at her. 
Her eyes flutter closed.  His hands push her legs up to her chest, spreading her as much as could be allowed with her pants still grappling at her knees.  Then he lowers his mouth, kisses her thigh, licks over her skin, inhaling the strong musk of her arousal.  When he reaches her core, it is all Rin can do to stay still.  Her back tries to arch but the weight of Kanda's hands on her legs pushes her down and she can't move.  The trapped feeling is somehow more delicious than she'd thought could be possible.  She stares sightlessly at the velvet ceiling and bites back moan after moan as Kanda's tongue dips and smashes against her wet folds.
But she can't hold back every moan.  Can't bite back every single flutter of desire.  And soon that trapped feeling isn't quite as delicious anymore.  Soon it is just a nuisance.  She wants more.  Wants everything he has to offer and absolutely no barriers between them.  "Kanda…" she half whispers, half moans.  Her voice is a cadence of all the lust he's ever wanted to hear from her and it makes him look up, locking his eyes with hers. 
The hunger in his gaze makes her breath hitch.  It doesn't take much to bring his attention to other things, to other wishes.  She whispers, "Help me…get these off."  She tugs a little at her pants and his eyes dart down to her hands.  Then he curses swiftly and grapples with her boots, heaving them roughly away so that he can get to those stupid pants.  But he doesn't complain, because after they are gone, Kanda can't really deny that it feels utterly delicious to nestle between her legs, against her wet heat, and feel her curl herself around his waist.  He sinks into her a moment later and he can't believe she feels so silken and slick, or how good it feels on his cock.
Kanda is vaguely aware that its probably her first time.  But he's also very much aware that its his first time, too, and that he's got something to prove.  He is rough even now, and yet he holds himself above her, rocking his hips almost gently, almost lightly.  Rin appreciates it because it hurts to have him breaking all her barriers so suddenly, and yet…
And yet she can't think of a better way of giving herself up.  His hips pin hers to crushed velvet and soon her breath is spluttering not from pain but from a pleasure that rips through her veins.  Rin gasps and holds him, fingers gently digging into his skin, his scalp.  His hair creates a curtain between them and the rest of the world, the passing landscape, the rattling train car.  He buries his face into the crook of her neck and sighs out, not quite moaning.  His voice is barely the edge of a moan, only the mere raw traces of one and yet it is strangely erotic, hearing that harried breathing.  Seeing those haphazard eyes.  Kanda's normally calm demeanor has been blown away as easily as breathing.  And because of her.
Her heart pounds against her chest and Rin is certain he can hear it.  Certain because he lay his head against her in his quest to press firm, darting kisses all over her skin.  His eyes seek hers.  He smirks a dark, low smirk that makes his gaze positively implode and she tips her head back when his hands move to pull her hips forcedly towards him.  He drags her into the thrusts with a gritty, palpable desire, determined to bring her to the ultimate high.
It doesn't take very long to succeed in that particular quest.  She is already half gone, ricocheting like a dart to a bull's eye that looms directly over her heart.  Her back arches high, her breasts shifting from the forces of his thrusts.  When she tips her head back, her long neck craning, her eyes wide as they stare at the space above her, Kanda nearly spills himself into her then.  It is only through fierce control that he holds back, only through the stifling desire to have her come first, to watch her undo herself at the mercy of him.  And he doesn't have to wait much longer.
His name is a mantra on her lips that is muffled, jagged, and thickens the air between them.  He slowly blinks down at her, dark eyes taking in every movement she makes, every bit of tension in her body as it begins to unfurl.  He feels her tightly clench around his throbbing member and he grits his teeth, caving over her as he watches her expression, the way she is gasping and looking at him and moaning.  Moaning like he's never heard.  Moaning like she's only ever done in his dreams. 
She's gasping his name and he's thrusting harder, in and out, and his cock feels so good when she's clenching down on it, making the space between them smaller.  He nearly can't breathe from the intense pleasure of her.  But then she's coming and Kanda doesn't even know the meaning of pleasure because he sees it manifest itself in her every movement, every shaky breath, every blind, grasping clench of her fingers.
"Kanda…Kanda, Kan-da!" he heaves his hips so hard against her that she sees stars, and so does he.  The next moments are intertwined and delicious as he watches her push her hips into his, body arching and climaxing in the most beautiful way he could have ever imagined.  And the sight of her, the way she clenches her legs around his waist, the way she can't seem to stop breathing his name, her eyes that shine with helpless passion, it all makes him come too.  Until he is spilling himself into her and panting through the edges of a moan and silently screaming at her through his harsh obsidian eyes.
Rin has never felt beautiful.  She has long ago accepted that she is not traditionally lovely, and that the scar which jaggedly trails over her eye will never go away.  But pressed against crushed velvet and hot skin, pinned beneath dark eyes which speak of silent romance, Rin feels like the most beautiful woman in the universe. 

Japanese Translation:

[1] Onna: woman



  1. Bloody brilliant! Your work never ceases to amaze. Why on earth are there not more comments? Loved it, completely XD

  2. Good lord! *turns fan on* i need to cool down after reading this masterpiece! *blushing furiously*

  3. This is one of my new favorites! I loved it, got me a little hot though...

  4. This has been my favorite for a while ^-^ Great character development in this one scene!! You're a very good writer ^3^ ������